Post-enlightenment? Post-shmenlightenment!
Things that have me convinced that I'm not an entirely rational human being:
1. I'm convinced that if i am in an emotional state of anger, frustration or stress, I somehow attract cars with idiots driving around them. I am convinced of this despite the obvious explanation that in these times of stress I am more likely to notice/be irritated by other drivers. Also, I am more likely to be in a hurry to get somewhere, and thus more able to be inconvenienced by the actions of other drivers. Nonetheless, I refuse to believe that these facts fully explain my magical ability to attract bad drivers in certain emotional states.
2. I live in an apartment by myself. I moved in basically by myself. Everything in my apartment is where it is because I put it there. In the case of my kitchen, I actually took time to think through what would be the most logical/efficient places for things to go. All of that being said, every time I go to get a glass, I have a 50% chance of opening the wrong cupboard (and there are only 2 choices).
3. About a month ago, I was convinced for several days that a person could see one's reflection in a screened door. Not, it is important to note, that I could see my reflection in some glass behind the screen. No, I was convinced that the mesh of thin metal wire was somehow reflective in a way that a person could see a fairly clear reflection of oneself.
4. In my early teens, after a particularly vivid dream, I became convinced that if I jumped off my parents' bed and flapped my arms, I could fly.
1. I'm convinced that if i am in an emotional state of anger, frustration or stress, I somehow attract cars with idiots driving around them. I am convinced of this despite the obvious explanation that in these times of stress I am more likely to notice/be irritated by other drivers. Also, I am more likely to be in a hurry to get somewhere, and thus more able to be inconvenienced by the actions of other drivers. Nonetheless, I refuse to believe that these facts fully explain my magical ability to attract bad drivers in certain emotional states.
2. I live in an apartment by myself. I moved in basically by myself. Everything in my apartment is where it is because I put it there. In the case of my kitchen, I actually took time to think through what would be the most logical/efficient places for things to go. All of that being said, every time I go to get a glass, I have a 50% chance of opening the wrong cupboard (and there are only 2 choices).
3. About a month ago, I was convinced for several days that a person could see one's reflection in a screened door. Not, it is important to note, that I could see my reflection in some glass behind the screen. No, I was convinced that the mesh of thin metal wire was somehow reflective in a way that a person could see a fairly clear reflection of oneself.
4. In my early teens, after a particularly vivid dream, I became convinced that if I jumped off my parents' bed and flapped my arms, I could fly.
posted by Bret at 3:26 PM
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